office funnies

[sarv_shaktimaan]

Not funny actually.. but something that just happened.

A colleague found a cell phone in a meeting room we walked into, I started to investigate.. in the first attempt I have it unlocked, then we saw the contacts and found it belongs to a senior citizen in the team. Returned it to him and advised to change the lock code. So all my colleagues are scared of me like how I was able to guess the phone lock code in first attempt itself.. I never told them what it was. Actually really simple, it was 2017. Most people put the current year for 4 digit codes or something stupid like 1234 or 9876.

I suggest a pattern like 2 squared 3 squared 4 squared .. so 4 9 16 .. or something like that.. numbers of birth year squared .. say 19(83).. so 8 and 3 squared 64 and 09.

[sarv_shaktimaan]

We interviewed a few candidates for a position in the team.. while prepping the questions for the interviews, one team member recalled he was once asked:

what would be last thing you would do if you knew the world was ending?

he says he had answered with .. I would spend that time with my wife.. Mischievous me immediately blurted out .. soooooooo only if the world is ending you would spend time with your wife.

btw, this guy sometimes reports he had a huge fight with his wife in the morning.

[sgars]

Cant believe actually used AAP idea.

One Amru suggested that since defects were piling up, we split and triage them separately. Conversation after that.

Me- How do we split the defects between us then?
Amru - Good question.
Me - How about dividing them by odd and even numbers.
Amru - Thats a dangerous idea.

Anyway, we divided on our areas of comfort

[sarv_shaktimaan]

Originally Posted by sgars

Cant believe actually used AAP idea.

One Amru suggested that since defects were piling up, we split and triage them separately. Conversation after that.

Me- How do we split the defects between us then?
Amru - Good question.
Me - How about dividing them by odd and even numbers.
Amru - Thats a dangerous idea.

Anyway, we divided on our areas of comfort

Should have gone with prime numbers and non-prime numbers .. would have been way cooler. Of course you handle the prime numbers only.. coz that means less work.

[sgars]

In the cyber coolie word Subject Object like ma'a behen ho gayi hai.

Example-
Assume that charchilla.com is there for displaying cricket info like hit rate, run rate, etc.

Some tester finds out that it is not displaying bowling speed correctly. Instead of saying "Charchilla.com is not displaying speed correctly" or "speed is not being displayed correctly", typical comment is "Speed is displaying wrongly" or as I saw today "Speed is printing wrong".



It is now w so widespread that Amrus also use the same lingo.

[Charchila]

Originally Posted by sgars

In the cyber coolie word Subject Object like ma'a behen ho gayi hai.

Example-
Assume that charchilla.com is there for displaying cricket info like hit rate, run rate, etc.

Some tester finds out that it is not displaying bowling speed correctly. Instead of saying "Charchilla.com is not displaying speed correctly" or "speed is not being displayed correctly", typical comment is "Speed is displaying wrongly" or as I saw today "Speed is printing wrong".



It is now w so widespread that Amrus also use the same lingo.

Thanks for reporting, I'll fix it.

[sgars]

Desi colleague- Chhutti me kya plan hai?
Me- Kuch nah I. Bus ghar baith ke diary piyunga

[sarv_shaktimaan]

So the story goes, this guy who used to work with us was off for a couple days. When he came back to work, he was narrating this story and I overheard it.. his uncle and aunt were quite old and sometimes sick, they would both take their medicines and sleep .. their schedules wouldn't match so they'd slip in and out of bed quietly so as not disturb the other. Apparently, after 4 days of not seeing his wife wake up, he tried to check on her and discovered she had passed away.

[sgars]

There is a song in gult movie 'bharat and nenu' which has this song 'i don't know'

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I AGREE

One guy at the apartment gym is listening to this song and suddenly starts saying ' I don't know' loudly.
No firangs in the gym so no complaints.

I still don't know what the song is.

A few days later I hear it on the car of another guy giving me a ride. Then I told, "so this is the song the guy in the gym was jumping on". The driver asked me who is tgat. I said "I don't know"

[sgars]

Originally Posted by ashdoc

If you or anyone starts attacking the way....

Now, this is loud and proud EC style. But the Cybercoolie version of 'attacking' is "Constructive Feedback", or increasingly, "Feedback"

[sarv_shaktimaan]

Some Telugu colleagues were giving me prasadam y'day for Vinayaka Chaturthi.. I was confused, then realized it's the same as Ganesh chaturthi. We were talking about when we were doing the pooja, 12th or 13th Sept.

I was saying how I get up early around 5am and do my prayers. One lady goes I wake up around 7:45am, another one calmly (what they call poker faced), asks her, did you set up an alarm for weekdays? The first one, didn't catch the sarcasm and went, of course, I set it for 7:30 but I'm up by 7:45 max.

[sgars]

Just went through many pages in this thread. Pleasant memories.