View Full Version : Why Indians dont greet each other in USA?
December 19th, 2000, 11:23 AM
I came to USA in Feb 2000.This is my first time outside India.
The next day my husband went for work.I was alone so I thought of going outside for a stroll.While walking I came across amies who greeted me with a smile or by saying "Hi".Later I came across a desi female.I smiled at her and said hi , she gave me a blank look and literally looked thru me.I found it so wierd.Thinking that may she is wierd i didnt mind.But as days passed by I realised that most of the desis are like that desi lady who i came across the very first day.They will look thru u.I asked many of my friends who had come to USA recently and they too said that they had similar such expiriences.
I dont know what kind of a complex do we desis get once ur in USA?????Well I havent stopped smiling at our desis though i know that they are not worth it, coz i dont want to be one of them(wierd desis)
December 19th, 2000, 11:59 AM
U know what Tsunami, I too had same experience. In CA b4 one year, I just start to Hi, namaste etc etc., but some people so blank look, I thought is there something wrong I did or what ???
yeap, some of them like that, but u know what ?? soon after getting insulted by this kind of people, u 'll become one like that.
December 19th, 2000, 12:48 PM
I too have seen this happen.
And frankly we have two chices:
1. Become like 'them'
2. Remain our friendly self.
I have chosen the latter. And no matter what, I smile and unbelievably, people have smiled back.
Would I do this in India?
But I believe the same people with a 'grumpy' demeanor suffer from fear of rejection. By accepting them first, I turn the response over to them!
One day...all of us videsee's will realise the POWER within...and will wake up to smile at one another!
December 19th, 2000, 01:41 PM
You are correct folks.
I have had even worse experiences.
1. You look at a desi, say 'hi'. He won't respond, but he will still look through you. (This happens most of the times)
2. You approach a desi (unknowingly), if he sees you first, he will turn his face away. (This happenes many number of times.)
3. Situation is even worse if the desi turns out to be a female. As I was entering a pizza hut, i saw a desi woman close just behind the door trying to go out. I casually said 'Hello', to my disbelief she turned away almost fuming, leave alone replying my hello. I asked my friend I had made any mistake in the way I said hello, and he said I hadn't.
This problem is highly prevalant among south Indians (no, I do not descriminate). Many desis think they did great job in comming over to US. What is even more unfortunate is that this problem exists among very young guys too :(
However, I stick to my guns. No matter what response I get, I continue to say 'hello' to all the people including desis who meet my eye.
December 19th, 2000, 02:16 PM
December 19th, 2000, 02:19 PM
Suspicion is the name of the Game
There are so many illegals also out here who do not talk to people for the fear of speaking out the truth and getting deported.
December 19th, 2000, 06:31 PM
Hey this guy Rakhwala also has a good sense of humour.Well I must say this was a wise crack.Hey Rakhwala u r good not only in Muslim Bashing but also in cracking some good jokes ;):D:D:D
December 19th, 2000, 10:31 PM
I 100% agree with Rakhwala.
I dont know why u should be so surprised when a Desi didnt smile back to u , or say hello to you ..when u greet them with a HI or HELLO .
NOT to forget the reality , this greeting of unknown persons ..is very rare in INDIA..else should i say never existed.
This is the culture which we have seen & learnt in US, and its absolutely absurd to expect a HI back from a desi who is new to US's HI & HELLO culture. I dont say this culture is bad ..but for many a desi population ..its new.
It may take some time for them to adopt this culture.
And for generalisation like ..more desis from south do this ..hmmm I AM SORRY
December 19th, 2000, 11:52 PM
aww .. Boomer !! who Frickin cares if one smiles at u or not ? for all u know , he's gonna sell u Amway .. Nobody's got any problems with fellow citiens smiling at you while u are in India .. how come all of a sudden u want all your fellow Indians to smile at you ?
Even if they smile at you , what are u going to make of it ? As it is , most americans smile at you , and say hi .. thats it . the buck stops there . No more pleasantries.. so whats your proiblem ?
December 20th, 2000, 08:36 AM
Just like they might sell you Amway you might sell them toothpaste and mouthwash if theyre smile isnt CLEAN....thats maybe why people expect smiles
December 23rd, 2000, 10:34 PM
Smiling is infectious,
you catch it like the flu,
When someone smiled at me today,
I started smiling too.
I passed around the corner
and someone saw my grin
When he smiled I realized
I'd passed it on to him.
I thought about the smile
then I realized its worth,
A single smile, just like mine
could travel round the earth.
So, if you feel a smile begin,
dont leave it undetected
Lets start an epidemic quick,
and get the world infected!
December 24th, 2000, 08:59 AM
I have never felt that Indians are less approachable in US.
Now those curt experiences people you have, they are quite explainable. Let's say an Indian has just arrived in US. That person has no idea of culture here, so obviously when you will give smile, that person wil be shocked and will go in loop to remember any moment when you had met her.
If that person gets to stay in an area dominated by Americans , then she will learn obout this very soon.
I have met so many Indians who are in US from more than 10 years or so and they never forget to give a smile.
And for exceptional cases of those morons who can never give smile whatever come may, I can say that they are in all commmunities and all countries.
December 24th, 2000, 09:07 AM
it's easy to explain this behaviour.
In India, people do not throw smiles at each other unless they know each other. It's humanely impossible 'cause of the population.
Anytime you go out on the streets in India, you must be meeting at least 500 people in 1/2 mile walk.
In the USA, you would meet about 50 people Max in 1/2 mile walk. so it's possible to smile at them without you getting a permanent grin !!:D
But go to NY city. Nobody smiles at each other on the streets 'cause ...you guessed right...too many people on the streets.:D
December 24th, 2000, 09:46 AM
Arya... when we talk of giving smile,its not when we are in busy places like airports.....
I am talking of those offices, restuarants, schools,....
December 24th, 2000, 03:35 PM
NY city is like Mumbai, brother. Nobody has time for smiles, grins and hello's. Nobody cares for you if you do know not him personally!!
All other small towns in USA are like villages in India. And in Indian villages, everybody greets everyone else in the village by saying
sounds familiar, right?
[Edited by aryaputra on 12-24-2000 at 06:43 PM]
December 24th, 2000, 04:15 PM
Well....We californians have a laidback life :D
Talk with any damn stranger and give a smile whoever looks at you.
December 25th, 2000, 03:32 PM
In Los Angeles too?
December 25th, 2000, 06:38 PM
HAA bhai HAA....LA mein bhi.
December 25th, 2000, 07:10 PM
In that case, I'll have to drop by in LA sometimes and say "Hi' to everyone!
December 25th, 2000, 07:54 PM
most welcome :D
December 29th, 2000, 02:31 AM
U don't stop greeting others, or else it will die for ever..
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